From Exhaustion to Presence: A Transformative Practice

For years, photography guided me into presence.

When my life took a turn I thought was for the better, which turned out to be for the worst, photography became the thread that led me back. Back to presence. Back to awe and back to joy.

Through the lens, through walking in nature, through paying attention, I begun discovering something:

My thoughts are not facts. And I am not my thoughts.

This was a captivating revelation.

The Discovery

If we can notice our thoughts, then logically, we cannot be them.

Simple subject-object dynamics: I see a tree. I love it. I photograph it. But I am not that tree. I can walk around it. I can close my eyes and stop seeing it. I can touch it, or walk away.

So what becomes possible with noticing our thoughts?

Is there something here, observing, witnessing, choosing, that is separate from the endless stream of stories my mind tells?

This was just the beginning of a thrilling continuous journey.

The Mind Is Not a Camera

I also discovered that my mind is nothing like my camera.

More like an automated projector.

My camera works for me. But my mind?

My mind was working for someone else.

There were plenty of people, plenty of conditioning, plenty of cultural scripts influencing how my mind operated. It was a heavy train running fast and confident, sometimes creative, smart, yes, but reporting to some other folks. Not to me.

I want my camera to work for me.

And I wanted my mind to work for me too.

I wanted to be included. Truly.

Questions That Kept Emerging

When you notice your thoughts, you notice the stories you tell yourself about how you should be, what you're supposed to like, what you're meant to do.

At some point I started to hear a very gentle yet persistent question:

What do I really want?

You can stop the storytelling. Or you can continue it.

What is to be gained is a choice.

You can decide.

You can play. You can experiment.

You can experiment with the unknown.

Photography, walking, exploring, these can become your guides. Just walk and see what emerges.

Dropping the Autopilot

The autopilot is the socialized mind. The culture. The scripts you've been carrying without questioning them.

Mindfulness looks like this:

• A moment of breathing before you sit in the car

• A body scan before you start walking

• Noticing: where are your thoughts rushing? What surfaces if you slow things down?

• What is alive within you right now?

  
  

Find time to listen. Photograph. Walk. Shake off the village. Be silent.

Apart from the autopilot and the incessant inner critic(s), what else do you hear?

The more you listen, the more you will hear your voice.

Bringing Your Voice Into the World

When you reconnect with your own voice, your authentic presence, you bring it into everything: leadership, relationships, creativity, how you show up in the world.

You stop reacting. You start creating.

You invite curiosity. Connection. Deeper exploration.

This process helps us be in connection with ourselves, which leads to better connection with others, which circles back to deeper (re)connection with nature and caring for it, so it can care for us.

This practice can be deepened and it's always there to rescue us, when we forget to listen.

Reacting vs. Creating

There's a difference between reacting and responding.

Reacting is automatic. It's the quick response expected by the external world. It's habitually shaped by what others want, what culture demands, what you've been conditioned to do.

Creating our own response means including ourselves in the equation. It means using our agency.

It means pausing long enough to ask:

What do I actually think?

What do I actually want? What feels true here?

Maybe you're at a point where your inner world and outer pressures are aligned. Where things are flowing and you're thriving. If so, congratulations! That's amazing. And I hope you'll share with me what worked.

But often, we need to check.

The litmus test is our level of exhaustion.

If it's there. If it's high. If you feel cynical, disengaged from matters you used to deeply care about, that's a sign of burnout. Of exhaustion.

And that could mean there's a disconnect.

A disconnect between who you are and how you're showing up. Between your inner truth and your outer life.

This is the signal to pause. To listen. To come back to presence.

Real Strength vs. Pretend Strength

When we are present, we are simply stronger. And we have more agency.

Not the pretend strength, the kind that's about "proving something" or following imprinted orders or commands.

This type of strength feels like a mask we wear so we belong.

Real strength comes from being open. Willing. Ready. Vulnerable and true.

That strength goes deep.

The pretend strength is just a reaction, automated, expected, designed to get validation.

But real strength?

Real strength comes from being here. Fully. As you are. With everything that is important to you. Having control over the design of your response.

From Exhaustion to Presence: the Invitation

This is not a journey I've completed. I'm not "better" or further than you.

I'm inviting you to connect; with yourself, with me, with nature, with others.

Through photography. Through mindfulness. Through curiosity and presence.

Cultivating our inner life and developing and deepening our relationship to our thoughts, feelings and body help us be present, intentional and non-reactive when we face complexity.

This is the work. This is the practice.

My Process

I love to combine photography, mindfulness, and positive psychology to guide myself back to presence, and to guide others.

This isn't about becoming a better photographer (though that may happen!!). It's about using photography as a doorway into awareness, curiosity, and authentic self-expression.

Here's what this journey looks like:

1. Noticing: The Practice of Seeing

We start by simply noticing. Noticing thoughts. Noticing stories. Noticing the autopilot running in the background.

Photography becomes the practice ground:

What do you see when you slow down? What captures your attention when you're not rushing toward a goal?

2. Listening: Finding Your Voice Beneath the Noise

Once you notice the stories, you can begin to hear what's underneath them.

What is alive within you? What wants to be expressed that isn't just reacting to external expectations?

We use walking, silence, and the act of seeing through the lens to create space for your authentic voice to emerge.

3. Experimenting: Playing With the Unknown

Real creativity, and real presence, lives in the space of not-knowing.

We experiment. We walk without a destination. We photograph without a plan. We practice being okay with uncertainty.

4. Choosing: Reclaiming Agency

When you realize you are not your thoughts, you gain something powerful: choice.

You can choose how you respond. How you show up. What you create.

You stop reacting on autopilot and start creating your own response.

5. Connecting: From Self to Nature to Others

This isn't solitary work. It's deeply relational and it radiates.

Connection with yourself leads to deeper connection with nature, which leads to more authentic connection with others.

Presence begets presence. Authenticity invites authenticity.

“...You’ll glow in this peaceful way. Your friends will be very, very happy with you. Everyone will want to sit next to you. And people will give you money!” - David Lynch on meditation

6. Embodying Real Strength

The practice isn't about becoming someone else. It's about becoming more fully yourself.

Real strength comes from vulnerability, openness, and truth.

When you lead from this place, everything changes.

This is the journey I offer: From Exhaustion to Presence.

Not as an expert but someone who's discovered that sometimes our own questions themselves are great guides.

“Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves(...). Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps you will then gradually, without noticing it, live along some distant day into the answer.” - Rainer Maria Rilke

If you're ready to examine the autopilot, and reconnect with what's true, let's talk!

For individual coaching partnership: contact me here

On-line group

Retreat on Vancouver Island

---

Hi, I’m Monika, Strengths Coach and facilitator. I help individuals and groups cultivate resilience, emotional intelligence, and well-being through strengths-based coaching. Passionate about transformative and creative leadership, I empower leaders to drive meaningful change within themselves, their organizations, and beyond.

I hope you’ll visit often, and I look forward to connecting and working together!